Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Inside my world of Autism.

         It has been a while since I last wrote a blog. A lot has changed since the last blog. My daughter is doing great, so far. She has become very social. She is reading, and expressing herself more than ever.
          With that comes a lot of frustration for her. She wants things done a certain way and cannot reason with any other way. If you live with Autism you can understand that.
          We went to the doctor and was referred to getting an Applied Behavior Analysis therapist to help her and me. I become so frustrated when I cannot help her.
           We have come a long way but there is still a long road ahead. All of the sleepless nights, therapies, hard work and dedication has shown in a big way.
          With the New Year approaching my resolution is to continue to help my daughter succeed and shine like she is meant to.
            It has been a rough year, a year without my dad. I am still grieving his loss. Christmas is the worse without him. I still hurt but my daughter helps me get through the day.
          One look at her beautiful smile and it makes all the pain go away. She is so happy and has no worries. I can learn from her. I hope 2017 is great for all of us!! I wish everyone a Happy Healthy New Year!!

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

Devotion and Perseverance

           Summer is almost over and school is approaching. We have had a great summer vacation and we are looking forward to school. My little girl is going into first grade (I can't beleive it). She is doing amazing!! She loves school.
            She loves doing work and seeing her friends and teachers. This year she is going to a different school (it might be a little challenging, it will be a new atmosphere).
            She will remain in the Autism program with six children, the teacher, and two teacher aides. The children are from her old class which is good.
              My son is going into tenth grade and my middle daughter is going into sixth grade. My, how they are growing up too fast. I will be working in the same school as my little girl and will be across the hall from her.
            I am excited to get back to work and meet my students!! I will be in the third and fourth grade autism class. My little girl has done such an amazing job. She has come a long way.
            All of the hard work, dedication, appointments, advocacy,  and most importantly the love, has paid off!! I just wanna say to all of the autism families keep your head high and never lose hope.
           It's an amazing journey and there's a greater reward at the end. Your child showing the world their capabilities and making their mark in the world. It's all thanks to YOU, the parents!

Thursday, March 24, 2016

Time Never Heals

            It is a year and one month since my Hero, my Dad, has passed and it has been a nightmare coping with his passing. They say that time heals all wounds...... well it hasn't for me, the pain and heartache only get worse.
            I feel like this is a nightmare that I cannot wake up from. His passing was an unfortunate quick one and has taken a part of my heart and has made me feel so alone.
           Every time I close my eyes all I see is my dad laying in a hospital bed suffering from a massive stroke that left him brain dead, that is the last time I saw my dad, helpless and in pain. The tears just rolled out my eyes because I wanted to take his pain away and I knew I couldn't.
          I look back at all the great memories we shared but that doesn't seem to take the heartache
away. I had a conversation with my dad before he had a stroke. As I walked into his hospital room I saw my dad laying there. I looked at his eyes and he had a blank stare.
           He seemed to look lost and confused. He was suffering from dementia. I said
" Hi Dad do you know who I am?" He said "of course its Jill". I had a huge smile on my face. We started talking and had a great conversation.
            It was pretty awesome. We laughed, we cried and then suddenly he said " I would like for all of the family to come and see me, especially Jill" (I am his baby girl) my body felt so paralyzed and I was speechless and started crying again. I said " Dad I am Jill, I'm right here. I didn't forget about you. I will never forget about you".
          Well that was the last time I saw my dad awake. He had a massive stroke that left him brain dead and passed away within a few days.  I can't stop seeing the images of our conversation and him sleeping and not waking up.
          I still cry everyday wishing he was still here. It's difficult losing a parent. I will never forget him and will always think of him and keep him in my heart forever. I love you Dad! R.I.P

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

My Blessing

                    It's been a while since my last post. I've been very busy with the kids and just life itself. My little girl is doing amazing in school! She loves school and likes seeing her friends.
                   She is excited that Christmas is almost here and wants a lot of gifts. She is getting homework in Kindergarten  (that's crazy right?) But she enjoys it. She is writing very well doing math homework.
                   She loves to read books and write ( she writes on everything in the house lol). She also has science in school which she loves because it brings out her curiosity.
                  She asks a million questions like but why mommy and what's that mean. She is a true blessing. I am glad she is my blessing.

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Never Underestimate What Autism Can Become....

             It has been a while since I have posted a blog about my daughters journey. I have been experiencing a lot of emotions and an unfortunate loss. This year hasn't been so great because I lost the one person in my life that means so much to me... my dad. It has been a roller-coaster of emotions but I'm trying to get through it.
             I have to stay strong for my children. My daughter is going into kindergarten this September and I am so excited for her. She has come a long long way. She is talking completely and expressing herself so well. I can actually have a full conversation with her.
             It's great and I love it. She will still remain in a self contained autism program. There is still a long road ahead but we will get there when it's the right time. You can't push your kids learning because you want them to be where they are suppose to be.
             Autism takes time and it's worth the wait. My daughter has become more social and expresses her emotions very well. She plays very nice with others. She plays Dr. And says she is Dr. Kate. Lol.
            She cares about everyone's feelings and is always trying to cheer them up. I love my daughter. I wouldn't change anything and I would do it all over again. Sometimes in life things happen and it hits you really bad but I've learned that you have to continue on.
              Never forget what has happened but look back and remember the memories and the good times. My children are what is helping me get through the loss of my dad.  I know my dad is watching over us and smiling down and saying great job my little girl! Well I learned from the best!
               My middle child is going into 5th grade and my son is starting high school. Time goes by fast. The kids grow up too fast. Life goes by too fast that's why you have to deal with the bad to enjoy the good. I hope you enjoy reading my post.

Thursday, July 9, 2015

Forever In My Heart...

It has been 5 months since you left. I thought as time passed it would get a little easier to grieve. That has not been the case. I miss you so much Dad. Every morning I wake up thinking of you. I wish you were still here with me. I know you are watching down on me and my family and walking beside me but it's not good enough for me. The tears still flow from my eyes cause it's hard to live without you. My heart still aches and it feels like it will never be whole again because when you left my heart broke into a million pieces.  I know you do not want me to cry and be sad anymore but you are my father and you were the most important person in my life. You have taught me things and have been there for me when I needed you. How do I go on without you? I can't ask you for advice, talk to you and laugh with you. R.I.P Dad February 12,2015. You are loved and missed dearly. πŸ˜’πŸ˜’πŸ‘ΌπŸ‘ΌπŸ‘£πŸ‘£❤❤πŸ’”πŸ’”

Friday, May 8, 2015

I Love Being A Mom

Mother's day is almost here and I am excited! I love mothers day for so many reasons. I have three wonderful children who have changed my life. They have taught me to be unselfish. They have given me great memories that will last forever. We have had great moments. They make me laugh,cry and most of all have made me proud. I am the mother I need and want to be because of my upbringings. I owe my parents everything because without their support and guidance I wouldn't be the mom I am today. So thank you Mom and Dad ( I miss you dad). Dad I know you are smiling down on me and are happy with all that I have become. I am a great mom because I learned from the best dad in the world! You have taught me how to make precious memories with my family because you were all about family. As long as I have your morals I know I will make you proud. You are missed and thought of every single day! I love you always dad!